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WOMAN ACCIDENTILY BLOWS UP TOILIET TRYING TO KILL A COCKROACH

VN:R_U [1.9.1_1087]
+4 (8 votes)

A young female employee working for a cleaning crew company in Taiwan was working alone one night and discovered a cockroach as she was cleaning around a toilet.

First, she squashed the bug with her shoe. Then, she wrapped the cockroach in tissue paper and crushed it again.  She wanted to be sure it was dead so she wadded it up in more toilet paper, lit a match and set it on fire.  She immediately dropped it into the toilet forgetting that she’d just cleaned it.

The result of the flaming cockroach and the cocktail of cleaning supplies in the toilet, she had just cleaned, was an extremely potent homemade explosive.  The explosion was so powerful it blew the toilet apart.   She was thrown several feet backwards and was hit with a lot of various shrapnel.   It also burnt off part of her hair.   The damage to our insured’s bathroom was quite extensive from the explosion and the flood and they have delayed her workers’ compensation claim.

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Selphie Clutz

VN:R_U [1.9.1_1087]
+8 (8 votes)

Plaintiff filed a lawsuit against a state park for an injury caused by a trip and fall. In her answers to interrogatories asking how the incident occurred, Plaintiff wrote: “I was taking a selphie and while posing, I backed up for a better picture and tripped and fell on a cement curb.” The defense is counting on the jury deciding contributory negligence on the part of Plaintiff.

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A GREAT EXCUSE FOR NOT SHAVING

VN:R_U [1.9.1_1087]
+6 (8 votes)

Hot off the press………………..Donald Trump’s hotel is being sued by an African-American man who says his bosses put a razor to his neck with an ultimatum … shave or get out of town.

The employee claims he worked as a security guard at the Trump International Hotel & Tower in NYC. He says his bosses got on his case because he wasn’t clean shaven. But he says he had a good excuse … he suffers from Folliculitis Barbae Traumatica — aka Barber’s itch.

The claimant says he tried explaining it’s a common condition among black males … which causes painful inflammation from ingrown hairs which is made worse when you shave. But he says his bosses didn’t want to hear it.

And this is choice … he claims one of his bosses even said, “You are not special. Why can’t you look more like Christine?” — a female Asian-American woman who works the front desk.

He then throws in the kitchen sink with various allegations that he was threatened, disparaged and even had his locker vandalized.

Of course he is asking for a MILLION Dollars.

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I forgot

VN:R_U [1.9.1_1087]
+8 (8 votes)

A man has been sentenced to a year’s probation for crimes he claims he can’t recall because of a brain injury suffered in a car accident. The 23-year-old feels he has become a completely different person as he struggles to regain his memory and motor skills – and no longer has a penchant for petty crimes fueled by drug use. He plead guilty to stealing aluminum tire rims from a salvage yard. He took in excess of 2,000 rims worth more than $33,000 in the two months before he was injured. I wonder how that went over in his statements to investigators

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XRAYS REVEALED SPONGE BOB STARING BACK AT THEM!!!

VN:R_U [1.9.1_1087]
+7 (9 votes)

A 16-month-old was taken to a hospital in Saudi Arabia because he had swallowed something. After x-rays were taken radiologists were shocked to see Sponge Bob Square Pants- in the form of a pendant -lodged in the boys esophagus – tongue out – staring right back at them.

Turns out, the rogue Sponge Bob belongs to his older sister. Doctors were amazed to see just how much detail you could see in the cartoon’s face in the actual X-Ray.

Doctors were able to remove the pendant from the boy’s throat and he was discharged to recover at home.

The images were later shared on online where radiologists and medical students can discuss cases and share the strange foreign bodies they find in their x-rays. The site shows all kinds of crazy things lodged in children’s bodies, from magnets and marbles, to nails ingested by curious people from all over the world.

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WRONGFUL DEATH SUIT AWARDS A FAMILY $165 MILLION DOLLARS

VN:R_U [1.9.1_1087]
+7 (9 votes)

A jury in Santa Fe has awarded an El Paso, Texas family $165 million in a wrongful death lawsuit against FedEx.

Attorneys for the family   who were killed in a June 2011 crash involving a FedEx big rig, told the local news station on Friday that the verdict sends a message to FedEx to improve driver training.

FedEx spokesman said the company “respectfully” disagrees with the jury’s verdict and plans to explore other options, including a possible appeal.

Authorities say the FedEx vehicle slammed into the back of the decedants’ pickup truck, which was pulled over on I-10 outside Las Cruces, New Mexico. The driver was killed but her 4-year-old daughter and then 19-month-old son survived.

FedEx driver also died.  The Fed Ex drivers’ family will only  be entitled to the state death benefit for workers’ compensation which is SIGNIFICANTLY LESS than One Million Dollars.

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Psychic Depo

VN:R_U [1.9.1_1087]
+7 (7 votes)

One of my favorite depositions was of a psychic in a breach of contract claim. I got to ask her “Why didn’t you see this coming?”

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Dryer Sheet Sham

VN:R_U [1.9.1_1087]
+6 (6 votes)

Plaintiff filed a lawsuit alleging Defendant hotel was negligent in keeping their guest laundry room floor safe from hazards. She slipped and fell on a dryer sheet, causing a back injury. During the hotel’s investigation, management reviewed the security tape, which showed the incident. Plaintiff walked into the small guest laundry room and pulled a zip lock baggie out of her purse. She pulled a dryer sheet from the baggie and dropped it on the floor. She took one step and slipped on the dryer sheet. The hotel took the position that it was Plaintiff’s negligence that caused the fall. The case was settled before trial for a very nominal amount.

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